Dance me…


Dance me.jpg

Dance me through
This pain of mine
This melancholy
This thorn divine

Dance me sweetly
Intertwine
Soul and spirit
Impurities refine

Dance me closely
Gently align
My will with yours
Grand design

Do you think that we, as humans, can benefit from times of pain and suffering? Do you think it teaches us timeless lessons? Or how about shaping your character? I do.

Nobody wants to go through painful experiences, but it seems like going through the tough times is what causes true growth and maturity in our lives. It’s like the age-old adage, “No pain, no gain”.

Allow me to share a few famous quotes about the good found in diversity.

“All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.” –Walt Disney

“You don’t develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.”  –Epicurus 

“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed on an equal or greater benefit.”  –Napoleon Hill

Man, I don’t know about you, but I see great wisdom in these quotes. I’ve been through the wringer when it comes to inner pain and suffering. All I wanted during those times was to be rid of it all. In retrospect though, I see how they have shaped me, grown me and made me into the person I am today.

How about you? Have you gone through times of pain, suffering, adversity? Have you allowed it to shape you? To be your teacher? Have you grown wiser and allowed it to develop character in you? What painful experience have you gone through, in looking back, you can see that it has produced gold by being refined in the fire?

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32 thoughts on “Dance me…

  1. I love the poem! It is beautiful! About pain, I can at least say that the most interesting, compassionate and wise people I meet are people who have gone through hardship in their lives. For me, going through tough times have certainly helped me to understand human nature better, to have more understanding with others who go through tough times and consequently be able to help them in a better way. I think, in short, pain creates empathy. It opens our hearts. But I do not think pain is necessary to live a full life at all. But pain is a part of the human experinece, we cannot deny that, we will all at some part of our lives have to face loss, disease, decay, and helplessnes. It is unavodiable. I choose, like you, to look at it as something to learn and grow from, not as something dark, evil or some kind of punsihment. After all, being human, is a journey, a learning experience. And every lesson learned makes us a little more beautiful.

    • Thank you so much Line. You are so kind.
      You said it so well, “the most interesting, compassionate and wise people.. have gone through hardship”. And it is so part of the human experience. What really makes the difference is how we handle it. Are we going to let it beat us up and through us into a river of rushing emotions, dismay and defeat? Or will we allow it to be our teacher? Not only our teacher, but our personal trainer? I’m so glad that you choose to allow it to teach you and build character and beauty.

  2. Oh, Staci, this is a tough one. Yes, pain shapes the path we take, and who we become. Sometimes it’s a bitter pill to swallow, though. I often wonder if my life was full of bliss, would I be less wise? Would i be less happy? Would I be less human? I am happy to be alive, and I am grateful, but I feel that I have paid my pound of flesh at times. Perhaps this is what it is meant by being tested by God? Is my life my Isaac? Not sure, but it feels like it at times.

    • Sometimes a bitter pill? For me, I would have to say always. I do let it be my teacher and personal trainer though. And I’m happy for the amazing lesson I’ve learned, thanks to pain. But I would much prefer to go through life happy all the time. Like the R.E.M. song, “Smiling happy people holding hands…” hehehe. Just a little joke (sort of). I like what Line said below, “pain is part of the human experience.” It really is inevitable. Unfortunately.
      🙂

    • That’s beautiful Laurie. Me either. And I’ve walked through some pretty dark valleys. They have, however, grown me and shaped me into who I am today. I attribute all that to doing exactly as you said, “what helped was looking a little deepter…past the story.”
      🙂

  3. I would not be the person I am today if it wasn’t for my painful experiences. If it wasn’t for me hitting bottom with my drug addiction and becoming homeless and hopeless, I wouldn’t have the loving relationship I have with myself, others and God. I would still be self-centered and prideful. When you experience and survive pain the world becomes an open land of gratitude. My pain was a gift. Love this poem!

    • I hear you there Vernon. Me too. I would definitely not be the person I am today if it wasn’t for painful experiences. I too, had to hit rock bottom so that I could see truth and realize that I needed help. I lost everything as well – boyfriend, house on fire, material possessions, friends, almost my sanity. My pain has accomplished so much. Not that I’ve enjoyed it. I’m sure a few of my wrinkles came because of it. But without the pain, I wouldn’t be content with the life I’m living now, the way I’m living it.
      I absolutely love what you said, “My pain was a gift.” And thank you so much for your kind words and appreciation.
      🙂

  4. Hello Staci,

    I do agree with you that the pain, though tough, is necessary to shape us, to remind us of who we are and where we are headed (that is, if we are goal-oriented). Spiritually as a Christian, we are not immune from pain and her sisters — adversities, misery, etc. But we can take solace in the fact that it is times like these that God shows His strength; He’s nearer than we can imagine.

    • Great comment Uzoma. Pain is part of the human experience. It’s how we handle it and deal with it that makes the difference. We all go through pain, Christian or not. But, like you said, “we can take solace in the fact that it is times like these that God shows His strength.” And I would like to add also that it’s times like these where we are refined by fire, so that all that is impure can rise to the top and be slivered off. Only what is truly valuable and pure will remain.
      Thanks so much Uzoma.

  5. I love the imagery. To look at problems as a part of God’s design shows exactly why suffering produces wisdom. Thanks!

    • I totally agree. Without going through what I’ve been trough, I don’t believe that I would have the insight or tiny bit of wisdom I have today. I certainly don’t enjoy the pain, but I know that it is producing in me that which is greater than gold.
      Thank you so much for your appreciation, kindness and wonderful comment.

  6. I’ve had my share, and I don’t care what anyone says. During that dark time, praying can be like the Psalms of David. “Where are you o Lord? Why have you turned your face from me?” When my wife died at 46 years old of cancer, I prayed and fasted continually. And in what I could only consider the meanest of tricks, I was watching an evangelist on television praying for the sick, when he received a word from the Lord. He said, “there is a woman out there by the name of Lillian (my wife’s name) who has cancer of the stomach (where it was located) and she is being totally healed.” I jumped for joy! Well, guess what. My wife never got better. I don’t mind telling you I went off the deep end. For over 10 years I went into a lifestyle that was as far from God as possible. But when my now wife led me back…Guess what. He was there waiting for me. To this day I still don’t have the answer for this cruel event, but I know I have a loving God who will one day tell me. And for now, that’s okay. It really is.

    • So true Richard. What I like about David and the Psalms is that he and his poetry/songs were real. There was no put on facade. He was real with God and others about his pain, sufferings, doubts, anger, joys, etc.
      What an amazing story. You definitely had a painful experience here. What I think is so totally awesome, is that you were honest with your feelings and the horror you felt and experienced. You went through a very emotional and trying time, but were able to resolve that God is greater. Isn’t it beautiful how He is always waiting for us to return.
      I’m so glad you’re ok with it.
      Thank you so much for sharing Richard.
      🙂

  7. I’m going through something hard right now but I know its for my own good. I know that this is part of God’s plan for me. Even though it hurts for a while and I become depressed God has changed me and I think happy thoughts. Ever since I got baptized I have seen that I have become stronger because of these things. Thanks for this 🙂 And beautiful poem

    • Oh Yazmin, I empathize with your pain. I know how it is to go through tough times and be depressed. I like what Line said below about how pain is part of the human experience. We go through it, but in the end we see how it’s shaped us.
      Thanks for your comment and appreciation sweetie.
      🙂

  8. I’ve learned that the reason these experiences are painful is because there is something in my flesh that refuses to be crucified, to come into alignment with God’s Word. As I have allowed the Lord to renew my mind. What once in the past caused me pain. No longer has the power to do it. Knowing this empowers me to surrender and obey Him no matter the cost. It also is an impenetrable defense against the evil in this world.

    Only Jesus can totally heal you. Leaving no scar. Receive His healing Stacilys. He loves you!

    • I agree that sometimes, in fact often, we go through painful experiences as a refining process. Like the gold going through the fire so that impurities can be removed. I’ve had my share of those moments, and I attribute them to why I am able to be content today in this current phase of my life (mom, wife, home builder, not being out and about, husband getting all sorts of recognition for his work, etc. The pride and selfishness factor has been worked on a lot by my creator, thankfully). I also think we go through painful experiences in our lives because it’s just like Line said below, “Pain is a part of the human experience.” Sometimes we go through painful experiences so that we can have empathy for others that will go through those same experiences in the future. And then there is also the fact that we live in a world that is full of all sorts of evil and horrible things. We, as humans have been given free will. A woman is raped. A child is kidnapped. I teenager is bullied and beaten into a psychosis (like a friend of mine), massacres at high schools, etc.

      Thank you Rita. I have received a ton of healing, thankfully. I’ve never been so complete and content as I am today.

      “-)

      • Yes, what the devil intended for evil. God will turn it around for our good and others if we allow Him. Otherwise many of us would have thrown in the towel years ago. Have a wonderful week.

  9. As much as pain hurts (it wouldn’t be called ‘pain’ otherwise) it does go a long way to shaping who we are as human beings. There are days when I wish I could erase all the pain I’ve suffered in my life, but I don’t think I would be the kind of person that I am today if I did.

    It’s hard to keep faith sometimes, but what other choice do we have? We have to accept that it is God’s will that guides us through life and that even the harshest of events happen for a reason, even if we can’t see it at the time.

    • Very well said Heather. I agree. I also have had a lot of pain in my life. Pain that really took a toll on me emotionally and mentally. I wouldn’t be who I am, nor where I am today without it.
      🙂

  10. Here as you linked to Kenneth’s latest post to date.

    I shall have to carefully consider the idea that refinement is like a dance. Perhaps I shall consider it by way of the martial disciplines and the Eastern paths. Right now, I am more for the metallurgical analogy– the old biblical “refiner’s fire”. Right now I am dealing with terrible physical pain, as well as some unhealed emotional wounds from past abuse.

    • I am so sorry to hear about your pain jaklumen. I know what it’s like to go through emotional healing. To this date I am dealing with things from the past. The life we live is filled with pain. It’s inevitable.
      I don’t consider the pain being the dance. I think of the dance as more like the intimate and emotional togetherness with God. As I’m suffering through the pain, I’m not alone, but He will dance with me (like the emotional expression found in certain dance styles) though it. He will lead me through it and help to learn from it and cope from it.
      I also am more for the metallurgical analogy of the refiner’s fire.
      Thanks for sharing.
      🙂

      • Great. I’ve said to others before that I believe that writing can truly act as a type of therapy.
        Thank you for your kind words.
        🙂

  11. Thank you for pointing me in the direction of these wonderful words. I really enjoyed reading the comments. Sometimes it is good to be reminded of the experience of others. I have not found that dance yet, but I have found some balance in my struggle with the pain that is part of me. Though I embrace it more willing now it will never define me.

    • I agree. Others experiences can really strengthen and bring hope.
      Oh no. You haven’t found that dance yet? When I have to go through that dance, I don’t enjoy it. However, in the end, when the night turns to day and I can look back, I can see the beauty made from ashes.
      Thank you Pete.
      🙂

  12. Another poem that I enjoyed reading. It sort of is haunting, but at the same time liberating–like one is facing fear, darkness, opposition, in order to reach freedom. I believe pain and struggle is necessary to grow and gain wisdom. One must know how it is to be weak in order to truly be strong.

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